


A Spat In Slow Motion

by concertigrossi



Series: The SHIELD Agent's Wife [3]
Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Dog Cops, F/M, Long Distance Relationship, Lovers' Quarrel, Protective Phil Coulson, The Cellist Starts Packing A Taser, text message conversation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-09
Updated: 2014-03-09
Packaged: 2018-01-15 03:12:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 765
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1288939
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/concertigrossi/pseuds/concertigrossi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The biggest problem with text messages, according to Phil Coulson, is that once you've absolutely, positively said the worst thing possible, you've got a lot of time to reflect on the fact that there's no taking it back...</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Spat In Slow Motion

**Author's Note:**

> This is much better if you've read [Second Fiddles](http://archiveofourown.org/works/527547), the first work in this series. However, as long as you accept that Phil Coulson is married to the cellist and that they're currently living on opposite sides of the country, it should be perfectly legible.

 

 

And there it was. He knew as soon as his thumb hit “enter” that he'd made a mistake, and SMS meant he had no way of taking it back.

 _Maybe I should suggest that to Stark for the next version of the software,_ he thought, somewhat hysterically.

“Alys?” he typed into his phone. “Let me apologize. I phrased that badly.”

There was no reply.

He placed the phone on the desk and stared at it with the air of a condemned man waiting the fatal blow. After a minute or two, it rang. He picked it up just as Jasper Sitwell walked into the room. Alys didn't waste any breath on preludes.

“I cannot believe you said that. I can _not believe_ you had the temerity, the unmitigated _gall_ to say those words to me. I wouldn't even have found out you were _dead_ if Pepper Potts were not the incredibly kind person that she is! So don't you DARE accuse me of being uncommunicative! And don’t you DARE talk to me, to ME, about having to sit and worry in silence! I spend my nights staring at the ceiling worrying what you're doing – I get a text from you that says 'Don't worry, I'm safe,' and I have to go run to turn on CNN to find out what part of the world just blew up or got invaded by aliens or whether the space-time continuum has gone into retrograde! Now, I am going to hang up, turn off the phone, and go to my meeting, because I refuse to let some petty thief disrupt my day more than he already has! I will call back when I feel like I have a civil word to say to you!”

The phone went dead.

“Wow,” said Jasper. “She yells pretty loud when she gets mad.”

“Yes, she does,” said Phil, setting the phone down.

“This one your fault or hers?”

“Mine,” said Phil. There was no use sugarcoating it. She'd had a point.

“Well, from one old married man to another, chocolate and flowers are unoriginal, but get the job done,” Jasper sipped on his coffee.

'From one old married man to another.' Phil raised a sarcastic eyebrow – Jasper and Leslie just celebrated their first anniversary the previous week. Nevertheless, the advice was good, even if he had no intention of talking about this right now. “Yeah, thanks. Did you need something?”

 

….

 

The call came as he was getting ready for bed.

“Hi,” she said.

“Hi,” he replied. “I'm sorry. I overreacted.”

“I am not a child, Phil. I am more than capable of taking care of myself.”

“I’ve never thought otherwise.”

“Then why?” she asked.

“Because you’re there and I’m here.”

“How is that different from all the times we were in the same city and didn’t see each other for days?”

He suppressed a sigh. “It’s not. There’s no logic to it, I agree.”

“I could just have easily gotten held up in New York as well as here – you’re not going to keep me safe from street crime unless you’re by my side 24/7.”

“It’s because I wish I could be,” he replied. There was an unnerving pause on the other end of the line, but before he could continue, she spoke.

“I wish you could be, too,” she said in a soft tone – he’d evidently hit on the right answer. “The chocolates are lovely, by the way. Thank you,” she said.

“You're welcome,” he said, relieved. “I certainly hope they’re good – I had to endure a relentlessly earnest lecture on the differences between Venezuelan and Peruvian _terroir_.”

Alys chuckled. “Portland, I’m telling you. A city of non-conformists all non-conforming the same way.”

He laughed. Still, there was one more thing. “Alys, please carry the taser. As a favor to me. I would rest easier if I knew you had it.”

“As a favor to you, I will,” she said after a few very long seconds.

“Thank you.”

There came a slightly awkward silence. “I was going to put on the new episode of 'Dog Cops'... would you like to watch it with me?”

It was a sad sort of date – they'd watch the same episode of a show simultaneously while discussing it over the speakerphone – but it was the best they could do, most of the time. As it happened, he'd seen the episode already with Clint and Natasha, but he also knew an olive branch when one was presented to him. Besides, he wanted to hear her voice.

“Yes, I'd like that.” he said, “Let me just get changed...”

 


End file.
